


My Priority

by ByTheAngell (SomeLittleInfamy)



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Gen, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-25
Updated: 2019-02-25
Packaged: 2019-11-05 08:11:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,270
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17915108
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SomeLittleInfamy/pseuds/ByTheAngell
Summary: When Magnus Bane goes missing, Alec struggles to balance carrying out his duties as Head of the Institute with searching for his boyfriend. But when the Consul steps in to question his allegiances he finds there's no question about it: his priorities have never been more clear.





	My Priority

**Author's Note:**

> The inspiration for this came from a discussion of how finding a kidnapped Magnus would be Alec's priority would make for a great parallel to Will's "She's my priority!" line about Tessa from TID. I wrote a little part of this on a Tumblr post, and decided to expand it into a longer ficlet!

In the back of his mind Alec knew this moment was coming. He can’t keep sneaking behind the Clave’s back without getting caught, especially not with the amount of attention on him and the entire New York Institute after everything with Jace and Lilith and the Owl. Still, he thought he might have a little more time being able to utilize the spare Shadowhunters for a bit of recon, using the computers overnight because the resources here are beyond anything he’ll have access to on his own, even with the offer of Catarina and her contacts.

Because it’s been seven days since Magnus went missing. Seven days since Alec saw his face, or heard his voice, or so much as received a text message from him. The others volunteer to help him search when they’re off duty, Underhill practically  _ lives _ on the network of surveillance cameras scanning the world over for any trace of the warlock, to no avail. If he just had a little more time… 

Time, however, is not on Alec’s side. Now the Clave caught on and he’s been summoned into the main hall of the Institute for an official reprimanding. He knows what’s coming: a cease and desist. Will they kick him out of the Institute or just strip him of his title?  Will they lock him away despite their clear inability to keep prisoners where they belong? 

He tells Jace and Izzy before he goes because he doesn’t know what’s going to happen and he needs them to be prepared for the very possible result that this is going to end poorly for him. Any ability he has to remain calm and diplomatic is gone; it left the moment Magnus was taken, and he was chained to this Angel-forsaken building chasing down convicts and cleaning up the Clave’s mess instead of searching for the man he loves.  

No more. 

They understand - of course they do. They’ve seen him the past few days, barely holding it together enough to fill out paperwork without his hands shaking so much the words become illegible. They’ve watched him close the door to his office and suspected the reason why at the muffled sounds of a sob or two he couldn’t keep entirely contained no matter how hard he tries. He did he best to stand by his duty, by his people, but he’s breaking and something has to give. 

That something might just be him. 

He turns to go face his fate when he hears the sound of footsteps following behind him. The noise belongs to Jace, Izzy, and Clary too, who came in towards the end of his conversation with his siblings. 

“What are you guys doing?” Alec asks, slowing to a stop. 

“We’re coming with you.” Isabelle says simply. 

“Don’t. I’ll take the fall; you were only doing it to help me, your names will never come up.” Alec shakes his head. 

“They won’t have to. We helped you because we wanted to, and we’re going to stand by you now because we want to. We’re here for you, Alec.” Jace doesn’t even stop walking as he speaks. 

“And we’re here for Magnus. He saved us so many times, and the least we can do is our best to return the favor.” Clary adds. 

The emotion Alec feels is overwhelming. He might expect this from Izzy and Jace, but to have even Clary vow to stand behind him in this… it means a lot, even if it’s support he doesn’t want. He can’t have any of them put themselves in the line of fire for his sake. 

Alec opens his mouth to protest but Izzy and Clary follow Jace’s lead, moving past where he stands, and it’s all he can do to turn and catch back up to them. His legs feel weak but he pushes forward with long strides to the front of the group. He knows it’ll be pointless to argue - they’re almost as stubborn as he is sometimes and he both loves and hates them for it. 

They see Jia Penhallow standing at the head of the room, posture drawn tall and lips pursed in a look of disapproval. Alec wonders if they choose the Consul partly on a severity factor.  

“Alexander Gideon Lightwood, current Head of the New York Institute.” 

Alec walks forward just a few steps in front of the others. “Consul Penhallow.” 

“I didn’t realize we invited half the Institute to this meeting.” The Consul says, looking with disdain down at the three Shadowhunters standing around Alec. 

None of them defend their presence, but they don’t make any move to leave either, making it very clear they have no intention of leaving Alec’s side. The silence falls heavy in the room. 

“Very well. I’m sure there’s nothing we have to discuss that you haven’t already divulged to your  _ friends _ , regardless of sensitivity.” 

Alec fights the urge to roll his eyes, but just barely. 

“It’s been brought to my attention that you’ve been conducting off-the-books missions to search for Magnus Bane.” 

“He wasn’t-” Clary starts so speak, falling abruptly silent with a grunt when Jace elbows her in the side. Alec silently thanks him. They might stand behind him for support, but he can’t have them speaking for him. He has to answer for himself, as the Head of the Institute. Plus, Clary is hot-headed, and anything she says in a flare of anger would almost positively be used against him no matter how well she means. 

“I’ve been looking for him while off-duty, yes.” 

“But using Institute resources, that could be put to better use tracking the escaped prisoners. Using Shadowhunters who - while ‘ _ off duty _ ’, could be volunteering that time towards our  _ own  _ work instead.” 

It isn’t a question, but she waits for his reply just the same. This is a dangerous game he’s playing - everything she says is true, but she’s spinning it to her advantage. What he, or anyone else, does in their off time shouldn’t matter. But to make it look like he’s pulling potential Institute resources? 

“Anyone who assisted me did so at my request - at the insistence of a superior, and are not to be blamed for their actions.” He has to assume she knows everything, and that includes whoever has even so much as looked up a name for him in the past week. His thoughts go instinctively to Underhill, tapping into the surveillance systems, among a number of others. He can’t let anyone else get caught up in this with him. 

“So you admit your actions are an abuse of power?” 

Alec feels Jace take a step forward behind him, the tension almost palpable in the air around the four of them. 

“No. As you stated, any efforts to track down the whereabouts of Mr. Bane were done off duty. No Shadowhunters were pulled from their assignments. No equipment was utilized that was already in use.” He holds his head high, gaze steady. 

“Luckily for you.” 

Alec wonders how someone can be so cold, so detached, in the face of someone simply looking for their loved one. 

“All efforts are to stop, effective immediately.” She pauses, before adding, “That includes yourself, Mr. Lightwood. You have a duty to the Shadowhunters,  _ not _ the Downworlders. Let his own people look for him.” 

“You can’t tell me what I’m allowed do in my free time!” Alec cuts her off, voice rising and  knowing he’s playing into her hand, but he doesn’t care. Tears sting at his eyes, not of sadness, but of frustration. 

He kneels in front of the consul now because he’s too tired to stand. Her words bring a feeling of defeat over him that he managed to keep at bay up until this moment. Now he’s used the last of his energy arguing his case, breaking down physically and emotionally day after day until it’s too much for his body to handle. 

Alec is tired. Between running the Institute and looking for Magnus he can’t remember the last time he slept more than an hour or two, running on caffeine and the hope that today will be the day, and that he isn’t already too late. And now even that hope is being taken from him. He can’t do this anymore - he doesn’t have the strength left to keep fighting. 

He feels a hand on his right shoulder, then his left, as his siblings reach out to not only comfort him but ground him as well. The Consul waits in measured silence until he’s regained his composure. 

“I don’t think you fully understand your position - there is no ‘ _ off time _ ’ for you. Your allegiance is to this Institute. You will not get a second request, Lightwood. Stand down. One warlock - who  _ isn’t even a warlock any more  _ \- cannot be our priority.” 

Something snaps inside of him at the finality of those words. 

“He’s  _ my _ priority!” Alec states, voice raising with every syllable, eyes narrowing. He doesn’t realize that he’s pushing himself to his feet again, Izzy and Jace’s hands falling off of his shoulders in the process. 

“Your people are here, which is where you belong.” 

“My people are safe, for now. Magnus isn’t. I can do both: I can run the Institute and look for Magnus. But if you’re forcing me to pick one over the other then it isn’t even a choice. I guess you’ll get along just fine without me until I get back.” 

“Don’t walk away from me, Mr. Lightwood.” But Alec doesn’t look back after turning away and stalking down the hall. “You’re going to regret this!” 

Clary shakes her head. “No, he won’t. But I think you just might. You need him more than he’ll ever need you.” 

“And you’ll be lucky to get him back after this,” Isabelle adds, turning to follow Alec’s lead with Jace and Clary close behind. 

They’re going to get Magnus back, one way or another. 

\---

They walk in silence until they’re well clear of the Consul. Jace, Isabelle, and Clary can all see the way Alec’s shoulders rise and fall with sharp, deep breaths; they see his hands clench and release at his sides and wonder what he’s going to say when they reach his office and follow him inside without asking if he wants them there or not. 

Clary closes the door behind her and the moment it clicks shut Alec collapses into his chair, head falling into his hands. 

“I can’t believe I just did that,” he says, words muffled by his palms. 

“It was amazing,” Clary reassures him. “And it’s what you needed to do. They can’t ask you to stop looking for Magnus - and you’ve been doing it without letting it interfere with Institute business. They had  _ no right _ to tell you to stop.” 

Clary says this with the sort of innocence that they see in her time and time again - she hasn’t grown up with the politics of being a Shadowhunter, with the expectations woven into every motivation they carry, every instinct they fall back on. Or, at least, they’re  _ supposed _ to carry and fall back on. 

“They had every right. And there’s no way they aren’t stripping me of my position no matter what I do now.” He hesitates, adding in a voice barely above a whisper, “...I wonder if this is grounds for deruning.” 

“We won’t let it come to that,” Isabelle reassures him. None of them mention that's exactly what they said about Maryse, too. 

Alec sits in silence for a few more moments, processing everything that just happened, before he’s back on his feet. “I’m going to need you to keep things running smoothly here while I’m away.” 

“Where are you going?” Jace asks. 

“I don’t know yet. But it’s clear I can’t look for Magnus  _ and _ continue my duties here, so… consider this an official temporary leave of absence.” He grabs a piece of paper and hastily scrawls a few sentences on it before sending the fire message off. “Jace, I imagine they’ll make you Acting Head while I’m gone. Try not to burn the place down.” 

“What do you mean, while  _ you’re _ gone? We’re coming with you.” 

Alec shakes his head. “No. I need you all here, and you’ve done more than enough already. More than I had any right to ask of you. I’ve been in contact with a few warlocks that owed Magnus a favor or two - they offered to help me if I needed it. The rest of you are to follow Consul Penhallow’s orders effective immediately. Pass that along to everyone who was helping.” 

There are a few moments of tense silence between them before Isabelle nods first, followed by Jace. 

“Alright. Stay in touch, let us know the second you need or hear  _ anything _ , got it?” Jace asks. 

Alec nods. “I’m going to get out of here before she tries to stop me. If anyone asks-” 

“You didn’t tell us where you were going. We don’t know anything.” Isabelle says without hesitation. 

Alec allows the brief hint of a smile before he leaves, grabbing his bow and arrows off a stand next to the door on his way out. 

Once they’re certain he’s gone Clary looks between the two remaining siblings. 

“We’re not  _ actually _ going to stop looking, right?” She asks, voice low. 

They shake their heads in immediate unison. 

“Not a chance.” Jace confirms. He knows Alec is going to kill him for this whenever he gets back, but he doesn’t care.  “We just have to be more careful about it. C’mon. We’ll call the others off, but after that we have work to do.”

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> For now this is just a one shot - I had this one random idea in my head I wanted to write, but no solid plans for a continuation just now! But who knows what inspiration 3B might bring...
> 
> (Find me on [Tumblr](http://bytheangell.tumblr.com) and also on [Twitter](http://www.twitter.com/By_The_Angell) while we all hang out waiting for someone to #SaveShadowhunters ! <3)


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